The observant Scandiroo reader might have noticed a lag of posts from me lately. To be honest, I have struggled to find something to write about. You see, when I started this little blog of mine I wished to make it essentially about positive things going on in my life. You know, happy little stories about love and laughter and silly kiddo incidents. I think I was scared, that I would otherwise be perceived as a whinger and a pessimist. Which I’m really not. Really. At least not when I’ve been fed and had my beautysleep.
However, it turns out that life isn’t always filled with rainbows and beach days. Sometimes the picture perfect family life is swopped for constant power battles with an almost three-year-old, bickering with Josh, and back pain from dealing with the giant, little Billie Maja. Worst of all, with all that comes a level of stress I’ve never experienced before in my life. It might sound weird to some. I mean, what do I do all day, right?!
Well, some days I basically do nothing else than trying to keep my offspring alive. Most days I even manage to have some fun with them, and on the goody good days I also do some washing. It is pretty basic, but it can also be very exhausting both physically and mentally. True story.
We had Abby in pre-school for three days for a couple of months, and it was great. She started making a lot more friends there, so she was suddenly happy to go in the mornings. I had enough time off with Billie to give her the attention she needs, and to get a little bit of stuff done in and out of the house too. Basically, it was just the right amount of time to suit our family. Now, due to bureaucracy and regulations we’re back to only two days a week. And it really tax my mental health. Actually, it has eaten into the whole family’s surplus of mental resources and we’ve been close to going into red figures all around. It’s like we’ve just been lacking that tiny bit of extra energy that could make such a positive difference in our every day life. Everybody has just been tired, grumpy and emotional on-and-off for the past month or two.
Fair to say, Josh’s busy life and my lack of a life (without kids, that is) is not the best combo in the world.
Hands down, I have never missed my mum and dad as much as I do right now. When they were here over Christmas they were true superheroes, and helped out in every possible way. We never needed to stress about a dirty house or a late dinner during those days, and there was always someone who would climb trees with Abby in the garden when she was going a bit crazy in the house.
Obviously I miss all that practical help now, but actually, lacking their company is the worst. I can kinda deal with the cleaning and the food preparation, but to see Abby cry because she misses them, just breaks my heart. On the tough days, it’s the main reason why everything gets a little bit harder than hard. Even though we have some lovely people in our life down here, the persons that love us the most are just too far away, too often. Booohooooo!
On the more positive note, we will travel to Denmark and see my family and friends relatively soon. To say that I am excited would be the understatement of the year. I can’t wait to go home. It’s been a year since I went last. The longest I’ve ever been away. Too long…
And hey – we’ve also had lots of fun times lately. Including a holiday weekend to Port Macquarie and the Ironman Australia, a family wedding, friends visiting and lots of outdoor adventures in the awesome autumn weather.
On the even more positive note – today Josh stayed home from uni. Partly because he slept in, but mainly because he wanted to give me a much needed break from the girls. Ahhhhhhhh! He took Abby to pre-school and has gone to Wollongong to hang out with Billie for some hours. They do need a bit of daddy/daughter-time and I do need a bit of me-time. All good. I might even kick myself in the butt and go to yoga later. Who knows, tomorrow I might even be on top of the world and sparkling with positive energy again 🙂